It’s time to look over your list of holiday gifts.
You’ll need to decide who gets a gift, how much you’re going to spend, and, most importantly, what to get.
During the traditional holiday season, the average family in the UK spends about £500 on gifts, which is about the same as what the average American family spends, which is about $650.
And while giving gifts can make you happy, show how you feel about someone, and even make relationships stronger, a bad gift can do the opposite.
Elizabeth Dunn, a psychology professor at the University of British Columbia in Canada and co-author of Happy Money: The Science of Happier Spending, says that giving the wrong gift can be dangerous for relationships because it shows that you don’t have anything in common.
Her research has also shown that giving someone an unwanted gift can sometimes make them think less of the relationship’s future.
Spending more doesn’t always mean a gift will be appreciated.
Since you don’t want your holiday gift to do more harm than good, how can you be sure to choose something the recipient will love?
The answer may lie in psychology.
Don’t worry about how much it costs
Should you just spend a lot of money to show you care?
Researchers have found that spending more does not always mean that a gift will be well received.
One study found that people expected people to like their gifts more the more they cost.
But while the givers thought that spending more showed more thought, the receivers didn’t connect the price to how much they liked the gift.
It’s not always best to give someone a gift as a surprise. People might be better off just saying what they want instead of leaving it to chance.
It’s not always best to give someone a gift as a surprise. People might be better off just saying what they want instead of leaving it to chance.
“It seems obvious that if you spend more, you’ll get a better present.
It turns out that there is no evidence that people care about how much a gift costs when they think about how much they will like it “Jeff Galak, an associate professor of marketing at Carnegie Mellon University’s Tepper School of Business in Pittsburgh, US, says this.
Galak studies how people make decisions and how they act, and he agrees that you might have to hit a certain price point because of tradition or expectations.
But once you pay that cost, “it doesn’t matter if you buy something more valuable,” he says.
Most important is the gift itself.
Think about the future
Galak says that the best way to give a great gift is to think beyond the moment of handing it over. He and his colleagues Julian Givi and Elanor Williams found this to be a common theme in studies on gift giving, including a paper they wrote.
Galak says that when people give gifts, they try to make the most of the moment they give the gift and see the smile on the recipient’s face.
“But what matters to the recipients is how much value they will get out of it over time.”
– Elizabeth Dunn If you have something in common with someone, get something that you both like.
In other words, it might not be very exciting to watch a friend or family member open a gift of a movie-streaming subscription, so you might be less likely to give one.
But if it’s a gift that can be used often over time, the person who gets it may really like it.
Forget about uniqueness
Galak also says that you shouldn’t worry about giving the most unique gift.
Sometimes, someone wants something that a lot of other people want or that a lot of other people have.
One study showed that when we shop for someone, we tend to think about their unique traits and personalities.
But being so specific makes us miss other things they might want or need, which could make us buy them a worse gift.
We also tend to want to buy different gifts for different people, even if they would all be happier with the same thing. These people may never compare gifts, but we still want to buy them different things.
Instead of buying a gift based on what you like, think about what you both like and choose something you can both enjoy.
Instead of buying a gift based on what you like, think about what you both like and choose something you can both enjoy.
Galak says that people think, wrongly, that they need to give a variety of gifts to feel like a good gift giver, even if it means not giving the best gift.
You might also decide not to buy something you already have because you don’t want to lose your sense of being unique.
So, those shoes you have that your friend really likes?
You shouldn’t avoid giving a matching pair as a gift just to be different.
Buy based on what you both like
Professor of psychology Dunn says that the best way to shop is to start with something you have in common with the person you are buying for.
She says you shouldn’t use your own tastes and change them based on how you and the recipient are different. Instead, you should think about what you have in common and choose a gift based on that.
“People are better at choosing things for themselves,” she says. “So if you have something in common with someone, get them something with the same interest, because something you like is more likely to be something they like.”
It is rude to ask someone what they want.
And it’s too bad.
People would be happier if we gave them what they want. – Jeff Galak
For an even better gift, think about something you both like and buy your recipient something they can do, like concert tickets or a cooking class.
Research has also shown that giving an experience as a gift can bring you and the person you’re giving it to closer together, even if you don’t share the experience with the person.
Ask what they’d like.
But if you don’t have anything in common, Dunn says to just ask the person what they want or use a registry.
In fact, studies show that people appreciate gifts they ask for more than gifts they don’t ask for.
“People want to be creative and surprise the recipient,” says Dunn. “But the best gift will be whatever they say they want.”
Galak agrees that asking a person what they want is the easiest way to make them happy with a gift.
He says that most people don’t like his answer because good gifts are supposed to be a “surprise,” even though science has shown that this isn’t true.
Money doesn’t mean as much as you might think because people care more about the thought and intention behind a gift than the actual item.
Money doesn’t mean as much as you might think because people care more about the thought and intention behind a gift than the actual item.
“It is rude to ask someone what they want.
And that’s a shame,” he says.
“Everyone would be happier if we gave them what they want.”
Don’t worry too much.
Don’t worry too much about giving a bad gift, because really bad gifts are rare.
Unless something is completely wrong, the person who gets it will feel some level of gratitude.
Galak says that during his research, he has asked thousands of people about gifts they have received, and he rarely hears anyone talk about a bad gift.
And even if you give a bad gift to someone close to you, your thoughtfulness may save you.
When someone gives a bad gift, it makes the person who gets it wonder why the giver chose it.
“When someone does something strange that needs to be explained, like give a bad gift, that’s when you think about what’s on the other person’s mind,” says Nicholas Epley, a professor at the University of Chicago Booth School of Business who studies how we take other people’s perspectives and make decisions.
His research shows that if the person you’re giving the gift to thinks you took a lot of time choosing it, they’ll appreciate the effort you put into choosing a less desirable gift.
So, the old saying “it’s the thought that counts” might actually be true.
Even if you don’t find the right gift, you’ll still feel good about the situation.
Epley says that when people put a lot of thought into a gift, they feel like they know the person better.
“Even if the person who receives the thoughtfulness doesn’t care much about it, the person who gives it does.”
